JamiMoyer
New Member
Posts:2
 |
| 01/18/2009 1:14 PM |
|
I decided I wanted to be a nurse in High School. So I'm here at Hocking Technical College working on being an RN. I have been in several relationships since I started dating. The thing is that with several of them, the guys say that I am too much a caregiver. For example: If he is sick  I ask what's wrong and I will give him cough drops, soup, back rub or whatever I know he needs.
Am I suffering these guys, being mother-like in ways? I hate to see them not being taken care of, but how do I stop being that mother?? Where do I set the limits?
JamiMoyer
|
|
|
|
|
Jen at NT
Experienced Member
Posts:194
|
| 01/20/2009 3:30 PM |
|
| What an interesting post-- and I am curious to hear how others respond. I am in the opinion that your caring nurture is not easy to separate from what you do personally and professionally. Sometimes your strongest asset can be your weakness too... I just hope you find someone who can appreciate your caring nature AND recipricate with no conditions. :) |
|
|
|
|
shovelhead
Experienced Member
Posts:141
|
| 01/20/2009 4:39 PM |
|
| We do tend to get a little clinical when our s/os get sick. I have found that asking first what they need is a better idea, rather than trying to go in and "nurse them without asking. Try to avoid the relationships where "all they need is a little fixing and understanding". Avoid users, alcoholics, and druggies. I have seen to many of my colleagues get sucked into a vortex and try to "fix" things for their boyfriends or girlfriends... You can do better! |
|
Motorcycle racing make heroin look like a vague craving for salt. |
|
|
TXGurl
Active Member
Posts:60
|
| 02/27/2009 12:52 PM |
|
| My divorce is a direct result of me "nursing" my ex. |
|
|
|
|
Marie Wise
New Member
Posts:1
|
| 03/13/2010 5:47 AM |
|
| It's called codependency my friend. Something most, NOT ALL, but most nurses are in one way or another. Before you have another relationship I suggest reading the book "codependent no more" by Melody Beattie. Wish I'd read it many many years ago myself. Would've helped me understand me and perhaps prevented at least one divorce. Not necessarily because I'm a nurse but because of my caring nature. Read it- let me know what you think! Certainly has helped me alot. First 2 questions I ask myself now are "can they do this themselves? what will happen if I don't do this for them?" most of the time they can do for themselves and will if I don't jump to the rescue. You want a man who can and will take care of YOU - that is IF you let him. Good Luck to you! |
|
|
|
|
KY-RN
Junior Member
Posts:23
|
| 05/20/2010 11:23 PM |
|
Just be careful. I see too many of my female colleagues in relationships with dirt bags that want nothing more than a woman who makes a good paycheck and they get treated like dirt. You deserve better than that. You will find someone who loves you for who you are and will appreciate your caring gift.
|
|
|
|
|